Long-time writer, editor, and number-one lyricist for National Lampoon (1970-1984), Sean Kelly has a bio page now. (About time.)

Things have been awfully busy out in the L.A. headquarters of your favorite brand:

• On September 5, 2002, National Lampoon acquired Burly Bear Network, a TV network distributed to colleges and universities.

• On October 10, 2002, National Lampoon struck a deal with ZelnickMedia in order to “build the legendary Lampoon brand.”

• On October 24, 2002, National Lampoon announced the launch of “National Lampoon Books.” The first title will be a reprint of the 1964 High School Yearbook Parody, originally published in 1974 and probably the most successful venture the magazine undertook during its heyday. It’s schedule to be released in about a year and will include a “where are they now” addendum.

• On November 5, 2002, National Lampoon officially changed its name from “J2 Communications, Inc.” to “National Lampoon, Inc.” (And about time, too.)

• And, most recently, on November 18, 2002, former National Lampoon publisher Matty Simmons has rejoined the company to “help reconnect the company to the wide network of National Lampoon alumni and return the company to its comedic roots.”

Other planned announcements include the first practical demonstration of porcine flight, the exhumation and reanimation of Doug Kenney and Michael O’Donoghue, and affordable health insurance for every man, woman, and child in the U.S.

Seriously, the future looks bright for National Lampoon fans. You can read more about these announcements on Yahoo! Finance.

Reader Tony Buford points out that Vincent “Web Pages That Suck” Flanders is ripping off the classic National Lampoon “If You Don’t Buy This Magazine, We’ll Kill This Dog” cover.

I appreciate Flanders’ often very funny insights on understanding how web design works (or doesn’t), but he’s not the most original creative thinker in the world, consistently relying on old clichés to get his points across (or to sell his books, in this case). This is not necessarilly a bad thing since it allows him to very quickly connect with his audience, but it is true.

In any case, he’s not the first to copy the “dog” idea, and I’ve yet to see anyone top the original. Here are some others I’ve seen:

• National Lampoon ripped itself off on the April 1985 cover showing an apparently French woman (she’s wearing a beret and holding a poodle, so she must be French) with a gun to her head accompanied by the line “Buy Zees Magazine or We’ll Shoot Zees French ‘Ookair!”

• Spy magazine did a variation of it in the mid-’90s, though I can’t remember who they threatened to shoot

• Mad magazine copied it on their October 1997 cover with “If You Don’t Buy This Magazine, We’ll Kill This Virtual Pet!”

• Former NatLamp publisher Matty Simmons re-staged the photo less successfully on the cover of his 1994 book “If You Don’t Buy This Book We’ll Kill This Dog: Life, Laughs, Love and Death at National Lampoon“

Incidentally, former NatLamp art director Michael Gross is selling signed prints of his original concept sketch of the cover on the Classifieds page.

Update: Michael passed away in 2015, so the aren’t available anymore. Plus, I pulled the plug on the Classifieds page. You had your chance. Just saying.

Update #2: While Flanders’ “Web Pages That Suck” website still exists, the page where he “ripped off” the “If You Don’t Buy This Magazine…” idea has vanished.

Mark’s Very Large National Lampoon Site has been chosen as the September 2, 2002 site of the day by Seven Wonders in the “Humor and the Unusual” category. Can’t say I’ve ever heard of the site, though they claim to be one of the longest-running Web award sites. Probably they’re hoping I’ll provide a link to their site. No big deal. I’ll be a sport. I’d like to thank all those who voted for me. I’d also like to thank all the little people who made Mark’s Very Large National Lampoon Site possible… (damn, they’re playing the music already!) … Thank you! Thanks everyone!

Update: Seven Wonders is long gone, but I’ve redirected the link to an archive of the page on the Wayback Machine.

NPR today ran (almost) the entire “Immigrants” bit from National Lampoon Radio Hour (from show #53; also appears on the Gold Turkey album). It was on their news program All Things Considered, trimmed slightly. And that’s when I woke up.

Just noticed that Yahoo! featured Mark’s Very Large National Lampoon Site on their What’s New page today. They describe it as “a labor of love,” which, I think, means there are no banner ads.

Update: Well, that link doesn’t work anymore. Wonder whatever became of Yahoo!?

Update #2: Luckily, I happened to make a screen snapshot of the page, which I’ve added above.

Mort Sahl, the man whom former NatLamp editor Tony Hendra credited as the progenitor of the kind of humor that reached its zenith with the National Lampoon, is now appearing every Thursday evening at 10:00 p.m. at the Laugh Factory in Los Angeles. I wonder if he still uses the newspaper in his act.

Roger Bumpass, who appeared in many National Lampoon stage shows and recordings in the late seventies and early eighties, does the voice of Squidward in the popular Nickelodeon cartoon SpongeBob Squarepants. Brian Doyle Murray also makes occasional appearances on the show as the voice of The Flying Dutchman. Arrr!

Update your bookmarks: Mark’s Very Large National Lampoon Site has moved into new digs. Forget the old address. (Like anyone could remember it anyway.) From now on, it’s www.marksverylarge.com. And no smart remarks from the back row. It’s supposed to sound funny.

If you’ve just arrived here from the old address, welcome!

Finally. For the first time in I’m not sure how many years, I’ve added more listings. The first to get them is the Books & Anthologies section, to which I’ve added National Lampoon Best of #3, National Lampoon Best of 4, National Lampoon Comics, and (drum roll, please) the National Lampoon 1964 High School Yearbook Parody. Whew. More to come…